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Why We Build Walls

Richard and I went to see Hadestown on Broadway this past week.

It was amazing, unexpected, impactful. The show retells the ancient tale of the Greek gods in a brand new way. But, what I really loved was one particular song - "Why We Build the Wall." The lyrics go on to explain … “we build the wall to keep us free.”

Now, this was probably intended as a political comment, however, I see this same thing happening in relationships.

We’ve all been emotionally hurt, or upset, or simply disappointed in relationships. And often in an attempt to prevent this from happening again, we create walls thinking we have to protect ourselves.

The problem with all of this is it's just like in the song in Hadestown — we build walls thinking these walls will make us free. But walls do NOT create freedom. In fact, think about it, if we build a wall around ourselves, we are the ones imprisoned.

They are actually keeping us from having the exact things we want in relationships -- that sense of connection, of openness. We can't have connection and openness with walls around our hearts.

Take a look at the walls you've built. Notice and ask yourself this question, “What is this wall protecting me from?” And notice if this wall is creating more freedom in your relationship. Is it creating more connection or less connection in your relationships? Just see what comes up. Don't try to change it. Don't try and judge, just notice. What did you find?

Anyway, that's it for this week. And … I urge all of you to see Hadestown if you're ever in New York and have an evening free.



P.S. - Here is the cast of Hadestown performing - "Why We Build the Wall."


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